Lesser of the Great Wild Goose Chases Around Robin Hood's Barn

I have this stubborn bacterial infection that just escaped going to the pneumonia that my wife has. Maybe, though, I have pneumonia as well. We had the same symptoms, but they took her chest X-rays and I wasn't zapped.

It doesn't matter, we're taking the same antibacterial and we got the same instructions - rest and drink plenty of liquids.

Now my wife just had a knee replacement and she has to have a caretaker. That be me. I don't have the luxury of chilling' out like my old cat, Mark.

Part of the impossibility to just sit down and rest are the doctors themselves. We are like Old McDonald's Medical Practitioners Farm, "Here a Doctor, There a Doctor, Everywhere a Doc-Doctor".  Yesterday I described our great lost in the wilderness of Ogletown-Stanton adventure of survival and yesterday I thought I was safe and secure in my living room armchair. I had a cup of coffee and was watching this horror movie, really unbelievable stuff, about these aliens running for President of the United States. It was bizarre and frightening stuff. There was this gentle brain sturgeon trying to get a word in edge wise, some big bully with very strange hair, a bend old man who seem to control a gang of teenagers, a woman barking like a dog among other strange and varied creatures...even the Pope popped-in; like I said, a really fantastic movie. I don't know where these scriptwriters come up with this stuff. Makes you glad it couldn't be real.

Anyway, the Physical Therapist came to torture my wife about then. Pain is unfortunately part of the healing process and the exercises are designed to stretch the leg to the limits so it will become normal again. This hurts and the pain can linger, which it had and kept her awake the night before. When we were at the orthopedist's on Wednesday, once we found him, he had asked if she needed renewed pain pills. She decided she could tough it out and said no.

Oh, I came to regret that no.

She told the Physical Therapist yesterday morning that she had changed her mind and wanted the pain pills. The Therapist, given my wife's pain pain level, agreed this was a good idea and the Therapist called the Orthopedist's office and told the secretary. Our concern was this is a controlled substance and might require a physical appearance at the druggist with script in hand, but the secretary told us the regulation had just changed and the doctor could call it in to the pharmacy. She did have to have the doctor do this, however, and he was in surgery. The Therapist told us to follow up with the pharmacy after 2:00  and make sure the doctor did it and if not contact the doctor's office to get it done. She was afraid if it was missed and 4:00 came we would not be able to reach the doctor that day. Otherwise, this seemed in hand and nothing more than a short drive later to the drugstore.

My family never seems to have short or simple anything. My grandmother used to say we never did anything that we didn't have to do at least twice. Why do grandmothers always have to be right.

The day began to pass and I thought about what to do for dinner. I knew we were getting low, but I had some pork chops and thought I'd do this pork chops with apples and onion dish. I had some apples and onions left, but when I went through the freezers, no pork chops. So, reluctantly, I went out to buy a few pork chops, and then when I got to the store I decided I might as well pick up some groceries for the days ahead, so already I ain't resting like I should.

I left the supermarket and see it is after 3:00, so I might as well zip over to the pharmacy and get that pain relief for my wife. Zip? Zap! Zig-Zag, this is when things went off track. The pharmacy had received no order for this medicine. I told the lady I would be back after I checked with the doctor.

She says, "Tell them we have a problem with our phones, they won't be able to call or fax it in. They'll have to send it electronically."

I rush home thinking maybe the doctor did call it in but was stymied by a bad phone line. By now it is after 3:30. I call the orthopedic office. I get the ever present maze of death, but I go right to the heart of the beast and press zero. Amazingly I get a human being on the first stab. She asks how to direct my call. I spill out my tale of woe. She transfers me to the doctor's secretary and when the phone is answered..."You have reached so-and-so, I am in my office from 8 AM to 4:30 PM daily Monday through Friday..."

I look at the clock, it is 3:45 so why aren't you in your office as advertised.

"...if you wish to leave a message, then leave your name and spell it, your number, your medical history, rank and serial number..."

I left my message of the missing medicine, the wife in agony, the broken pharmacy phone failure and hung up to tell Lois the bad news. I doubted we'd get her pain pills today.

I told her I wasn't going to cook, it would be McDonald's. She had another medication on order, the antibacterial, and she asked me to pick it up anyway. So on my way to buy dinner, I stopped back at the pharmacy to get this medicine and what do you know, they had just received the order for the pain pills, but weren't sure they had any in stock.

For some reason this pharmacy often seems not to have medication in stock and needs days to get it.
Not this time, he had it and the medicine would be ready in a half hour. (I wonder why it takes a half hour to count 14 pills out of one bottle into another? One of those unsolvable mysteries of life.)

Now I go back home. I immediately get a phone call. It is the orthopedist secretary telling me the order had been sent. I told her I knew, the drugstore had it and thanked her. I hung up. The phone rang, it was the pharmacy calling to say the medicine was ready.  I went back, got it, got dinner, ate too much, but at least Lois could get some relief.

Now all through this I was praying and as you can see the prayers were answered. But did there have to be so much drama about it?